|Second Exercise in Parallelism||
Directions: The following sentences could be improved with the use of proper parallel constructions. Under each sentence, a text-area is provided where you can rewrite the sentence. You may either rewrite the entire sentence or click on Suggested Beginning for a suggested start to that sentence (which you can then finish). When you have finished rewriting the sentence, click on Grammar's Version for a look at how we would rewrite the sentence. Explanations [in brackets] are also included with Grammar's version.
If you try to cheat by looking at Grammar's version first, you will be afflicted with intense dental pain. Don't say you weren't warned. There is, however, no single right answer to these rewrites, and if you come up with a clearly improved version (or find a mistake), please write us e-mail (using the ASK GRAMMAR form on the main page of this Guide). Thanks to SCOTT ROBINSON and IVA-MARIE PALMER for suggesting better renditions for some of Grammar's versions!
1. Espinoza's style was remarkable for its dexterity, grace, and she could play any position.
2. Raoul's motivation to succeed in this program seems to be greater than his sister.
3. Three of the great Indian nations in the Central Plains are the Cherokee, the Choctaw, and Comanche.
4. Either you will begin to study now or risk failing the exam.
5. The college has space for a new computer lab but not a faculty lounge.
6. Her conditions for signing the contract are, first, the commissioner has to approve the terms; second, that the other players must sign as well.
7. Carlos wasted his first year at college by not studying enough and spending too much time at parties.
8. We have no doubt about her care and interest in the proposal.
9. The students prepared for their exams at home, they spent extra hours with their tutors, they did the necessary research in the library, and asked questions in their classrooms.
Guide to Grammar and Writing